Life Unhinged

Posted: November 19, 2014 in Uncategorized

Many events have occurred in the last few months. Started dating, moved into my own place, stopped dating, rescued a new kitten. My old life has unhinged itself to a great extent. 
Dad accepted a job in Missouri and they will be moving soon. They have been getting the house fixed up and ready to sell. The pool is gone, the house has been repainted inside and out, carpets been laid and new doors throughout.  It is bittersweet. The house I grew up in will soon be sold and my parents will be living 5 hours away.
My grandmother has not been well the last few months. In and out of the hospital and nursing home.  She fell last week and broke her arm so she is back in the nursing home for now.
I was dating a wonderful man named Tristin, but life got in the way and he recently broke it off and says he is moving to another state. I am heartbroken and sad about the whole situation.
I do have my own apartment now and I enjoy being there. I rescued a five month old kitten a couple weeks ago.  He can be a brat most of the time, but he is a total mamas boy. He follows me around the apartment and is very vocal when he can’t find me.


The root of all evil…

Posted: June 26, 2014 in Uncategorized

Money is both good and bad. I had been going back and forth about getting a low limit credit card seeing as my credit is not good enough to get a place of my own yet. I finally decided to apply for one after figuring up the right way for me to use it. It took a couple tries, but I was finally able to get approved for one through my bank. It will be here in about 10 days. It will help me pay for my prescriptions and my therapy appointments. Money is always tight when they need to be filled and now I won’t have to wait to fill them.

Things have been quite hectic recently. We lost 2 out of 4 of our third shifters this week. Mikey and I are the only ones left now. Hopefully, we can find trusting people to fill the slots. I have to go in tonight to cover. Hoping this migraine will go away before then.

I am trying to change my sleep patterns as well so I can get up with enough time to eat and take my meds before having to rush out the door to work.

Roughly, two – three weeks ago I had to rescue my golden retriever from being stuck under the stairs outside. She has been okay since, but is still digging in the same spot. I am hoping to break her of it or I will have to put a fence around the bottom of the steps.

Posted: June 15, 2014 in Uncategorized

My ears: bleeding. My bed is rocking with the waves. I can hear your voice, but your touch eludes me. I don’t want romance or love or commitment; just a simple hand to hold when the days are still.


Posted: June 2, 2014 in Avoidance

I hate this feeling. I have feelings for one of my good friends. He and I get along so well and have the same interests but alas he is taken and in love with my closest girlfriend. Blah blah blah

Crazy in a handbasket

Posted: May 25, 2014 in Good Day, Medical
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The last couple days have been a bit hectic for me. I got my new bed Friday and Saturday I went to Peoria all day to see family and do some family tradition adventures we do once a year. It was a good time and I am glad I went except I didn’t get enough sleep before work. It made for a long night. Even more so I went another weekend working with him. There is so much about him that tells me no, but so much more that screams yes! I feel him in my fingertips and toes. I feel this presence about me when he is around or I hear his ringtone in the darkness of my bedroom. One day it will fall into place and no matter how it shatters, I’ll be ready. 

New Stuff!

Posted: May 22, 2014 in Good Day

Yesterday I bought a new bed and I can’t wait for it to get here tomorrow morning. I’ve been in a lot of back pain recently. I’m hoping the new bed helps. My anxiety has been a little weird today. My chest has felt heavy and I have had a very dark feeling. I feel very rundown and anxious. I’m hoping that it is just a phase and by tonight I will be ok to go back to work. Its been a long couple days off but my b12 shot went well. My counselor appointment was very productive.  My counselor is going to order a copy of the workbook I purchased last week. I have been doing my best to work on it but time seems to be limited. Hopefully when I get my sleep pattern back I will have more time to myself to read. My typewriter broke today I’m hoping I can find someone to fix it. I use it for a lot of my writing and my first drafts. Time for me to head to bed. I have to go back to work tonight at midnight. Today is my Monday!

Sleep. Ugh

Posted: May 21, 2014 in Avoidance, Bad Day, Medical, Uncategorized

Who would have known a 14 hour headache required 14 hours of sleep. I took a sleeping pill at noon yesterday so I could rest. I woke up at 2 am. I am going to start taking only a half of a pill when needed. That much sleep means much more pain. My shot went much better than expected. Didn’t feel anything. My counseling session went well and we are working on a new workbook now. Today will be a day filled with cleaning and organizing and maybe some writing or gaming.


Got a couple hours of sleep before being woke up by this pretty girl. 6year old Pailsey is pure breed Golden Retriever.


This is Tetra. My two year old Husky-German Shepard mix. They love being outside and playing in the sun.

Video  —  Posted: May 19, 2014 in Good Day, Picture
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Posted: May 19, 2014 in Good Day, Medical

Currently it is my ‘Thursday night’ so when I awake this evening it will be my Friday. Then I get my first shot and see Evelyn tomorrow. Tomorrow will be very interesting and I will post all about it I’m sure. Goodnight everyone.